What if: Vocaloids met English songs?
by Musical2day
Summary: What if Vocaloids found out about English songs? With One Direction, shotas, (I resent that! Len shouted,) and most of all, strangeness, what will happen? Disclaimer: I do not own the songs/characters (Rated T for Meiko's drunk behavior and language) (Not meant to offend any fans!)
1. Chapter 1

"You don't know your beautiful~" Rin sang, holding an orange to her mouth. " What the-" She turned around, immediately spotting her counterpart. "Len, isn't this song awesome! It's from One Duh-rec-tion!" Rin fumbled with the word, since her Japanese accent prevented her from pronouncing it correctly. Nevertheless, Rin look satisfied.

Len looked at the big bowed girl, horrified. "That's the worst music since the Beatles!" "Hey!" Rin pouted, "You're just jealous they look manlier than you, shota…" Len lowered his head. "Huh? What's wrong?" she asked, noticing his shadowed face. " ULTIMATE TICKLE ATTACK, COMMENCE!" The banana lover leaped on her, dancing his fingers over Rin's body. "AHAHAHA!" Rin screeched with laughter.

"What's the big commotion, guys?" Both looked up to see the teal-haired diva, waving rapidly. Wait, was she waving something at them? "Hey," Miku started,"Did you ever hear of Justin Bieber? He's so HOT!" After proclaiming that particular statement she rushed off, probably to share that fact to the rest of the Vocaloids. The blondes, forgotten, stood still, jaws gaping. Rin was the first one to snap awake. "Lenny~ Time for revenge," she said, her voice sickeningly sweet.

Miku walked down the hall, happily humming the tune of 'Baby'. Suddenly, she bumped into something. Looking down, the diva saw it was none other than Kasane Teto. "Miku!" the drill headed girl shrieked, "This song is just too offensive!" With that, Teto shoved her pink iPod to Miku's face.

Do you like waffles? Yes, I like waffles!

Do you like pancakes? Yes, I like pancakes!

Do you like French toast? Yes I like French toa-

Teto jammed her finger against the stop button. "So, what's the problem?" "Problem?" the girl's voice was deathly quiet. " Problem!" The volume rose dramatically. "THE WHOLE SONG IS A PROBLEM! WHY, THEY DIDN'T EVEN _BOTHER_ TO INCLUDE FRENCH BREAD! THEY EVEN HAD FRENCH TOAST! ARGH!" She screamed in frustration. Then, she stomped away, her fiery aura trailing behind her.

Miku blinked, then shrugged. Whatever happened, it wasn't her problem.

Gakupo walked slowly through the hallways. He had noticed that almost all the Vocaloids were acting strangely. Most of them were humming unfamiliar tunes, others hungrily staring at albums. Speaking of that…

"Luka, dear~" Gakupo sang, "Are you going to tell me your cup si-" "Go google it." Luka replied blankly. "And don't call me 'dear'. I'm not your wife. Also, have more respect. Don't call me by my first name without any honorifics." "But we're on friendly terms!" he whined. "No, we're not." Luka deadpanned. Gakupo fell to his knees, horrified. "NOOO~"

"I CaMe iN LikE A WreCkIng BaLl!" Meiko warbled, "I NevEr HIt SO HarD iN-" "Meiko nee-san!" Kaito cried out. "Please stop! For the matter, where did you get the sake? I thought I locked it up…" "Neru-chan gave me the key~" Meiko giggled drunkenly. "Such a nice girl." "Geez, I walk out for one second and _this_ happens?" "Oh yeah, why did Miku-chan want you?" The ice cream man flushed. It-it's none of your business!"

"Oh~?" Meiko peered up suspiciously, before bursting into a song. "MiKu aND KaITO siTtiNG in A TreE. K-I-S-S-I-N-G! FiRsT COMeS loVE! TheN CoMEs MArriAgE! ThEN CoMES sEx-" "Woah!" Kaito put up his hands. "Did you just add something PG-13?" (AN: Damn it, Meiko! This was going to be a K plus story!) "Whaddya mean? Oh~ I know! Do you want to do it with Miku?" "How much did you drink, Meiko nee-san?" Kaito asked, trying to cover his tomato red face. "Not a lot~ Only… eight bottles?"

Neru typed on her phone. Suddenly, she looked up, whipping her golden hair. "Get away from me, Lily*. I'm not interested in English songs." "Aww…" the author moaned, "I thought I had a good hiding place." She carefully jumped down from the ceiling, and landed perfectly on her feet. "Lily. How are you going to get that ceiling tile back in place?" "I dunno," Lily tugged nervously at her black hair, "With a stick?" "You're going to have to find out a way soon," Neru said, redirecting her attention back to the phone.

"You're the one who's going to put it back."

"Let it go, let it go, the cold never bothered me anyway!" Yuki sang, hopping place to place.  
"Yuki, get back in here! You're going to get pneumonia!" "Nu-uh! I'm Frozen!" the nine year old shouted back. "Oh god, I never should have let her see that movie." Oliver said in English. "How did Yuki even _understand_ the lyrics?" He sighed. "The world will never know."

Master looked up, realizing a lot of noise coming from the house. "What the hell is going on there, I don't want to know."

* * *

*I mean the author Lily, not the Lily Vocaloid. I included myself, since I'm just awesome like that.

So, how was it? I might put up another chapter if new songs or other Vocaloids are discovered. Did you ever watch Frozen? You get a cupcake~ Yay~


	2. Author's Note (Nothing bad, I promise!)

I decided to make another chapter to 'English Songs', but I need more songs to write about. So please, suggest some songs in the review box below. Or, there is the option of PMing me. Try to be creative about the characters that will sing it, there shouldn't be that many repeats. But then again, you probably shouldn't use Vocaloids no one ever heard about...

I already used the song 'Bad Boy' by Rihanna, 'The Cup Song', 'You Don't Know You're Beautiful' by One Direction, (also very discreetly, 'Baby' by Justin Bieber,) 'Do you like Waffles', 'Wrecking Ball', by Miley Cyrus, and 'Let It Go', from Frozen.

Love you guys~

Lily (Musical2day)


	3. Chapter 2

**_I do not own the Vocaloids/songs/awesomeness. Wait, I do own the awesomeness. Cookies to_** **you! **

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Gumi was sprawled on her carrot-themed mattress, bopping her head to 'Happy Synthesizer'. She looked up, spying a camera. "Japanese songs fit me just fine. Who needs American?"

_'Clap clap thud thud thud clap thud thud clap thud clap thud clap thud thud.'_ That tune repeated about three times, before a certain pink-haired woman started singing. "I got my ticket for the long way round, two bottles of whiskey for the way~" "And I sure would like some sweet company," A new voice joined in, "Maybe by the name of Gakupo~"

Luka whipped her head towards the door, her face forming an irritated expression. "And exactly how did you get into my room?" Luka asked crossly, "If I remember correctly, I changed the lock." "Tsk, tsk. It's going to take more to keep me away! We were _meant_ to be together, Luka!" Gakupo cried dramatically. A visible tick mark appeared on her forehead. Slowly, she moved toward the eggplant/samurai man. Picking him up by the scruff of his collar, Luka threw him out the door. "Don't. Come. BACK!"

Miku knew she was popular in stardom, especially with boys. So the first time she heard the song, 'Rude Boy', by Rihanna, the diva was instantly hooked. She sang it in her shower, hummed it when reading, and one time, Miku almost started singing it in a concert! Mikuo, her twin, complained about it one day. "Sis, this is becoming an unhealthy obsession," Mikuo said, placing his hands on his hips, "That's you I asked Master to wipe your memory of the song. I hope you understand. This is for your own life." "NO!" Miku wailed, tears blurring her vision. "Master, we're ready." A dark shadow loomed over the teal-haired girl. "Let the memory wiping begin," the voice said ominously.

Kaito was eating ice cream when that fateful moment happened. He was, Kaito remembered, eating good, creamy, chocolate ice-cream. Suddenly, his ears perked up. "Is it just me, or is there a lot of censored language going on..?" Indeed, everyone around him could hear a distinct inhuman noise, coming from… his phone?

"What does the fox say! Hatee hatee hatee ho~ What does the fox s-" Hastily, he opened up his phone. Seeing that the caller was Neru, Kaito growled softly. Surely, it was the cellphone-addict who changed his ringtone. "Hello." he forced out. "What the hell do you want?" "Oh my, someone is in a bad mood," said Neru. The man could almost hear the smirk in her voice. "What the hell did you do to my phone!?" He yelled, frantically. People around him stared. One mother walked away briskly, a child in hand. "God, is it that upsetting?" Neru asked with exasperation. "Yes, it is," Kaito hissed, "Especially when people look at you like you're a total moron!" "Well, then," Neru began, "I'll hang up, now."

The blue-haired Vocaloid sighed. Then froze up, as the phone began vibrating, bringing on another round of 'What does the Fox Say?'. "Kami-sama, do you hate me?!" He shouted at the sky. Yes, Kaito, he does. He got ten calls in total on that single day. So, children, remember to play nice.

"Korea is so dull, sometimes," A blonde with cat ears moaned, "It's a good thing I brought my iPod, or else I would be dead from boredom." SeeU sighed for the millionth time that morning. Scrolling through her list, she rejected one song after the other. After about five minutes, SeeU finally picked a song. "Dancing Queen," she mused, "Americans really have to be more creative with names! I mean, the song, 'You Don't Know You're Beautiful'? Any song title with more than three words are just lame. At least they're finally picking up on English movie names…"

After that rant to herself, (Am I going crazy? Geez, I didn't know I was desperate enough to talk to myself.) she hit the 'Play' button. (AN: That reminds me, did you guys see the 2013 rewind?) 'You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life. See that girl, watch that scene, digging the Dancing Queen!' SeeU jammed her finger on the pause. "First of all," she began, "How old is this song? 'Digging?' 'Jive?' Almost no one uses those words anymore. Second of all, who _wrote _this song? Is he a creepy stalker? Or is it a she?" SeeU took a breath. "Congratulations, me," she said, sarcasm heavily laced into her words, "I officially went crazy."

* * *

**So, I decided to put up a short chapter. I get really guilty when I don't update for a week, so that's why I usually write one-shots.**

**Sorry,but I might not be able to use all of your songs that you gave me~ :( But I will try to use at least 1 from your list.**

**Thanks to: B.L (Guest) and zhane17! **


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